Ask a Medium! Interview with Medium Lisa Wechtenhiser

This is an interview with Lisa Wechtenhiser, who is an intuitive, medium and healer at Practically Intuitive.

One of the reasons why I wanted to interview Lisa is because I regularly get questions from readers about mediumship – the practice of being a medium. Lisa is a medium AND a psychic (a medium is someone who can talk to the dead and pass on messages from the dead.) Whereas a psychic (like me) is someone who can talk to other beings such as spirit guides, and the higher self, but does not talk to the dead.

In this interview Lisa and I talk about all kinds of topics relating to mediumship. Included you’ll find tips and tidbits of info such as:

• How to contact your deceased loved ones
• Lisa’s thoughts on questions such as, ‘Can anyone be a medium?’
• How Lisa discovered her gift of mediumship

And more.

If you have a question about the general topic of mediumship that Lisa and I don’t go into, perhaps you can leave a comment at the end and one of us will do our best to answer it.

Enjoy!

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Anna: Lisa, how did you discover you had a gift for mediumship? How did you get into this area of work? I’m quite curious to hear about this!

Lisa: I think it truly started when my goddaughter passed away in 2006. I’ve always had the sense that there is more to life than just the physical part and Lauren was a big influence in helping me experience that. While I could ‘hear’ her very clearly, I didn’t think I’d be able to ‘hear’ anyone else. But, doing Reiki healing on others was where it really blossomed for me. I think there’s something about that vibration that makes it easier to tune in. As I was doing sessions for my Reiki clients, I often got their deceased loved ones wanting to share a message. I don’t even recall asking for the gift or even understanding it until I got more used to it happening with my Reiki clients.

Anna: This sort of brings me to the next question. Do you think that mediumship is a gift that everyone can learn, or do you think that there are some people who are just naturally attuned to the vibration of deceased loved ones? More than they are attuned to say, spirit guides or angels? And another thing I was wondering…Maybe it is a common thing for a mediumship gift to show itself when a person has lost a loved one?

Lisa: To answer your last question first, yes. I think there is something about the loss and the grief and the longing for that connection to continue that creates an intention for mediumship. It certainly did for me. But I don’t know that everyone has the ability to connect with the other side just yet. (I think it will come once we get we are all connected and know how to work with telepathy skills.) I think I’ve learned to read the signs and have created my own vocabulary to understand those things, as I have with my psychic skills. It’s just another ‘language’, really. But I do think the intent to connect has to be there, the willingness to be open to what shows up and the ability to take what you get and learn to decipher it.

Anna: A question I personally have: Does receiving messages from deceased loved ones feel much different from receiving messages from spirit guides or a person’s Higher Self? Do you experience it differently?

Lisa: Not overly so, no. The vibration is higher with guides and teachers than it is with the deceased loved one, and I can discern that but the energy of the loved one is very clear.

Anna: I am asking this I guess because the times when I’ve gotten a message from a deceased relative on behalf of a client, it feels totally different from talking to spirit guides. It’s like I have to strain really hard to understand what they mean – like hearing someone down a crackly phone from a long way away. Whereas talking to spirit guides is like being in the room with someone. Maybe you don’t experience it that way because you’re already attuned to the deceased loved ones.

Lisa: Interesting. For me, it’s pretty much the same. It’s a different vibration when I’m communicating with deceased loved ones, yes, but as clear as the info I get from Spirit Guides.

Anna: I have also got a lot of emotion come through when talking to the deceased. I feel a lot of love coming through, whereas with the guides I don’t get that as much. But it’s only happened to me a few times so I don’t have many experiences to draw on.

Lisa: Yes, exactly. I feel the BIG LOVE that comes through from the deceased. Every once in a while, I get that from a person’s Spirit Guides but it’s not quite the same. I’ve often had the deceased explain things to the person about what happened or how much they love them. It’s kind of nice. Maybe as a medium I feel a lot of emotion from the deceased because they are closer to our vibration than Guides?

Anna: Yeah. I enjoyed it the times it happened. It is nice.

Lisa: My goddaughter always comes through *TWINKLY* – it’s nice.

Anna: That is nice. I’m also thinking about why a person might have the gift of mediumship and be attuned to deceased loved ones. You mentioned that you lost your goddaughter. I think that we are often called to help others with things we’ve been through ourselves. So that we can understand the person’s suffering and help them – just a side thought.

Lisa: Yes, connecting with those on the other side feels like a very sacred thing – like I would never ever do it as a “party trick”.

Anna: Yes. I know what you mean.

Lisa: Which is why I can’t watch TV shows like NJ Medium because it feels like it’s taking something I consider sacred and putting it on for show. For people who aren’t familiar with it, NJ Medium is a television show here in the US about a woman in New Jersey who is a medium. She’s real kitschy and I think it’s the “Hollywood” version of a medium. I don’t like that.

Anna: What about shows like ‘Medium’? Do her experiences as shown on the show bear any resemblence to the reality of channelling a deceased person? For example, do you get hit over the head with a message for someone when you’re out and about, and is it vivid like watching a movie? Because the medium on that program has very dramatic experiences, but maybe that’s because it’s for TV so it has to be dramatic.

Lisa: I think that was inspired by a real life medium with an eye toward it being as realistic as possible. For me, it’s not like a movie. It’s often in the bathroom when I am “visited” by the deceased and it’s always something I hear with my “mind’s ear” (Note from Anna – through clairaudience). I generally don’t get pictures, I get words – sentences, as if they are just chatting with me.

Anna: I see. I have lots of people who comment on this blog who have recently lost someone. Do you think it’s possible to ‘be your own medium’? If so, how can those people contact their loved ones? What are the ways in which deceased loved ones might be getting our attention?

Lisa: I do think it’s possible to receive messages from deceased loved ones. I’ve heard about people receiving a phone call with no one at the other end shortly after their loved one dies. We all got that from Lauren the morning she passed away – I did, her mom did, my other cousin (one of Lauren’s favorites) did – and we all knew it was from her. I know a woman whose deceased husband leaves her playing cards around the nightstand.

Anna: So, they can move objects and our belongings.

Lisa: I think the intent has to be there, first. You have to want to connect with them and if they are available to connect back, they will. Electricity is especially easy for them to work with. Songs are also a good medium (ha!) for connecting.

Anna: My grandparents experienced that too with my mum’s sister, who passed away several years ago.

Lisa: How cool – I love reminders like that. Did it surprise your grandparents?

Anna: No. They believe in the afterlife so it didn’t surprise them.

Lisa: That’s pretty open…good for them!

Anna: I had a dream in which my mother’s sister told me she was messing with the clocks. It was a few months after she passed, and I rang my grandparents and told them. They said that their big old grandfather clock was doing strange things, and they’ve had it for decades. It had only just started malfunctioning. It stopped playing up when they realised it was her.

Lisa: Interesting! I guess she just wanted their attention!

Anna: Yeah. So they can mess with objects, use electricity and come into our dreams. And there’s the songs. What about if we aren’t getting any communication at all from a recently departed loved one, but we want to?

Lisa: Just like our Spirit Guides do, I think the deceased use whatever they can to reach us.

Anna: Can we make more of an effort? Is there anything that can be done?

Lisa: I almost never hear from my mom. She died six months after Lauren and she’s very, very quiet. I think there are things that we can do (for example, intend to connect, and be open to signs) but if nothing shows up, perhaps there are other things that the soul/person needs to be doing on the other side. I think people can feel abandoned because they don’t hear / see / feel but that’s not true that they’ve been abandoned. There just may be other things going on – that’s my sense. Maybe my mom doesn’t want to talk to me! (My mom would talk to a wall if she could!)

Anna: So, in terms of other things that a soul can be doing on the other side — I guess they have somewhere else to be, as part of the next stage in their soul’s evolution.

Lisa: Yes, perhaps the next stage is all-consuming. If my mom rolls around, I’ll have to ask her. It’s just my sense that if they don’t show up, don’t take it personally.

Anna: For example, a soul might be planning their next incarnation, doing a lot of healing on the ‘other side’ or learning about something they need for a subsequent incarnation?

Lisa: Yes. That would be my guess. I’ve heard that there’s a life review when you pass over and perhaps getting some of those lessons and figuring out where to go next is paramount.

Anna: Yes. I have heard that too.

Lisa: I feel bad when people want to connect with a deceased loved one and the person doesn’t show up. My friend’s mom died and she asked me to connect with her and nothing came through. Until one day, in the bathroom, she came to me and said “I’m ready now”. She shared a message that brought tears to my friend.

Anna: Wow, so it’s really when they’re ready. Just because you might not hear anything now doesn’t mean they won’t show up later.

Lisa: Yes, that’s my sense (and experience).

Anna: OK. I read about a technique in a book which I want to share. I don’t know if it works but it seemed like a great technique. It was in a book called Destiny of Souls: New Case Studies of Life Between Lives by Michael Newton.

Lisa: I believe I read that a while ago.

Anna: Michael Newton is a hypnotherapist who regresses people to past lives and between lifetimes, in order to help them to understand and heal things about this lifetime. He actually started off as an atheist, I believe, but soon became to believe in the afterlife when the descriptions of the afterlife from his clients who were regressed under hypnosis, seemed to be very similar. This is what some of his clients have said from their memories of being a deceased person and trying to get through to a loved one who was left behind on earth.

1. It’s really hard because when you lose someone, the grief makes it hard to connect. It’s like it clouds the connection, so it can sometimes be easier to connect with a deceased loved one in a dream when you’re grieving, because the grief that clouds things isn’t so huge when you’re asleep.

Lisa: That could very well be true. I wonder if it’s because I was very familiar with my clairaudient gifts that I was able to tune in so clearly.

Anna: 2. If I remember correctly, Michael Newton recommended to take a garment or a possession of the deceased loved one, and hold it, focusing on the person, thinking about them, remembering them and the sound of their voice. And ask them if there is anything they want to say to you, and see what comes to you. It might be a sense of knowing that your deceased loved one is OK. Or it could be a sentence that you get. or a song comes into your head, or you get a vision, or whatever.

Lisa: That’s an interesting idea. Making that connection in the physical as a bridge to them on the other side. The thing there is to trust what you get. That’s where people get hung up. If you do an exercise like that and get a song lyric or something that is meaningful, a lot of people seem to think it’s a “coincidence”. It’s totally not.

Anna: Good point! I know exactly what you mean.

Lisa: So much of what I do in general with my clients, and you too, perhaps, is validate for them what they get. I’d say most of them really ARE picking up the messages and the signs but they don’t always trust themselves.

Anna: Yes, I think you’re right.

Lisa: I always try to point that out – many times I’ll say, “There’s nothing I told you that you didn’t already know. But you just needed some validation on it.” That helps them learn to trust (even just a bit more) what they get. And that’s really the key to all of this whether you’re talking with Guides, loved ones or even animals – TRUST WHAT YOU GET! I grew up trusting what my mom got (she was intuitive too) and it’s served me well.

Anna: And that’s the name of an e-book you wrote, right Lisa?

Lisa: Yes, funny you mention that!

Anna: Let’s say a person can’t connect to their dearly departed on their own. And needs some help. That’s where a medium can come in, right? So I have some questions about mediumship readings. Is it OK for a person to consult a medium right after someone has died? Is that the best time? Is there an ideal time to consult a medium?

Lisa: Good question. I think there’s no “perfect time” to consult with a medium. It’s when you wish to know something. However, I will say that it’s best to not get dependent on the medium to do this. Say what you need to say, get to some place of peace and resolution and continue to move forward. Meaning, don’t spend all your time trying to communicate with your loved one. They have stuff to do too but it can lead to “spiritual imbalance” or spiritual addiction, as you mention in your course. I don’t talk to my Goddaughter Lauren 24/7, but she pops in once in a while and we say ‘hi’ and then I go back to my life, and she to her work. I don’t want to foster that dependence in any of my work and I know you feel the same.

Anna: That makes sense. Yes. Plus, we will meet again with our loved ones when we ourselves end this lifetime, so it’s not forever.

Lisa: Absolutely. That’s what I remind myself when I’m roaming a store and see something that I Lauren and I would giggle about – I know it’s just a temporary distance. I think understanding the big picture of the soul’s path helps. Even though I desperately didn’t want Lauren to leave, I understood that it was part of her soul’s contract and all I asked for was the courage to walk that path with her. It doesn’t mean I don’t miss her but it does mean that I understand the bigger picture. I know that we’ll be together again.

Anna: Yes, that is good to remember.

Lisa: I’d be sad if I thought this was all there was.

Anna: Yes, me too! I’d be really depressed.

Lisa: For real! I can’t even imagine thinking that.

Anna: Nope. I think that atheists are rather brave!

Lisa: Me too. Good thing I know otherwise. That’s their path of evolution – I’m all for following our path.

Anna: Yes. Another question — before a reading, do you need to know anything about the deceased person you’re trying to connect with? or do you prefer to know nothing? I know some mediums who prefer to know nothing and some who don’t.

Lisa: I prefer to know less than more, but I’ve done it both ways and the information that comes through is good so it’s all in what the person wants to share, I think.

Anna: So, it doesn’t matter so much – basically, whatever the client feels comfortable with?

Lisa: Yes, that’s how I do it. I imagine each person finds what they’re comfortable with doing readings. I love doing “cold” readings where I know nothing. They’re my favorite.

Anna: Do you think that deceased loved ones can become our spirit guides, or reincarnate into our family? What are your experiences with that? Often people think that their deceased relative has become their spirit guide when they’ve passed, for example. Are they just confusing the person popping in with a bit of guidance and advice, with the actual role of being a spirit guide?

Lisa: I’ve heard that asked before and my sense is no, they don’t become our spirit guides. Again, this is just my sense and not “the word of law” but I believe that Guides are much, much more evolved than we are at present and if someone’s recently departed, it’s my feeling that they have not yet reached that point. I think you’re right – there may be some confusion there. The vibrations are very different.

Anna: OK. Perhaps people think this because a deceased person can pop in with guidance from time to time? Or advice? That is, if they’re watching over someone. And a person can confuse that guidance with the guidance that comes from a Spirit Guide. But it’s actually not coming from the same source.

Lisa: That difference is perhaps not something a non-intuitive/psychic can discern easily. I think our loved ones ARE often around but not like our guardian angels. They have their work to do as well.

Anna: Yes. Totally. What happens if the deceased loved one you’re trying to contact has already reincarnated into another incarnation? Can you still contact them?

Lisa: I would say yes – you can still contact them because they communicate from the soul level and not the personality level. Again, that’s my sense.

Anna: Can deceased loved ones incarnate into our families? Say, for example, will a grandparent pass away and then come into the same family as the great grandchild?

Lisa: I suppose that could happen – I don’t see why not. It’s all in the life contracts we make pre-incarnation. I talked with a woman last night – and it became clear that she and her daughter were also mother/daughter in another incarnation and came back to do it again this time. So, sure. Why not? What’s your sense?

Anna: I think it happens often with miscarried babies – as in, if a baby is miscarried, often that baby might come back at a later date and incarnate into that family as a child, if the mother gets pregnant later on.

Lisa: I could see that.

Anna: That’s what I’ve heard and I think that’s where it happens a lot. But I don’t think it happens that a grandparent incarnates as the great grandchild as often as people think it does.

Lisa: If the soul contract was to do that, then yes, I can totally see that happening.

Anna: I think it might happen, but probably not as often as we think.

Lisa: I also heard you can’t reincarnate into an animal but I’m not sure that’s true.

Anna: Yes. I read that in Michael Newton’s book Destiny of Souls: New Case Studies of Life Between Lives – that animals are on a different soul path from humans. So, it’s highly unlikely they will incarnate as a human. As unlikely as a human would suddenly veer from their path and try out an animal incarnation.

Lisa: I’ll have to dig through my voluminous library and grab that book again!

Anna: It’s a great book!

Lisa: Yes, that’s my understanding as well.

Anna: I just finished it. It’s actually two books. The first is Journey of Souls: Case Studies of Life Between Lives and the second is Destiny of Souls: New Case Studies of Life Between Lives. They are both good…

Anna:So, what do you think happens after death? Maybe that is a big question. Could you summarise the important bits?

Lisa: You go through your Life review – look at the lessons you learned, set up your next incarnation, float around with harps and send songs to various radio stations to be heard by the ones you left behind! Okay, I made up the last two. I’m not sure about the harps. I am sure, though, about the life review. I’ve heard that the movie with Albert Brooks and Meryl Streep (it’s called ‘Defending Your Life’) – gives an idea.

Anna: I would add healing to those steps as well – what do you think? Maybe for the souls who didn’t do a lot of healing while they were incarnated. Some people can go through a lot of trauma in their lifetime and then when they get to the other side, they have a lot of healing to do.

Lisa: Yes, I’d add healing (and harps). Seriously, though, that’s one of the reasons I think my mom is incommunicado. She had a lot go on in her life and I think she needed a lot of time to process it. Others have communicated with her, though, and she’s told them that she’s around me more than I know.

Anna: I wonder if cutting cords of attachment while you’re alive means you have less to process when you’ve died? That’s just a thought I had.

Lisa: That’s a good question. I’m inclined to say yes.

Anna: Yes, I am too, because you can get the lessons from your relationships in this lifetime, rather than waiting until you cross over.

Lisa: Yes, and move along your path faster. I think I’ll ask my Spirit guides about that. It’s food for thought. I think anything we do here in the physical to facilitate healing and growth helps immensely.

Anna: One last question: What are your favourite books on the afterlife/death/grieving? Any that you’d recommend to readers? I’d recommend Michael Newton’s books Journey of Souls: Case Studies of Life Between Lives and Destiny of Souls: New Case Studies of Life Between Lives
for anyone who really wants to understand the soul’s path better.

Lisa: I’d agree with you about the two you mentioned. Thanks for interviewing me!

Anna: It was a pleasure. Thank you!

If you have specific questions or want connection or communication with a deceased loved one, you might want to book a private reading with Lisa here.

Or do you have a general question about mediumship that we didn’t answer in this interview? If so, please leave your question in a comment and one of us will respond.