Comments on: How to Turn off Overactive Empathy

By: Teresa Terben

Teresa Terben — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 04:21:28 +0000

I was always an extremely happy person and the life of the party. Then, my mother and dad divorced and my mother started dumping her pain on me. When I left for college, she called long distance, and even now in my 60′s, her negative calls can go on for hours. They have been making my life my life miserable. I started teaching learning disabled stuents in between time, and then everyone in the world seemed to sense that they could talk to me and tell me all their troubles. It’s true. I do so care about everyone and everything. I have let all of their problems and my oversensitivity nearly ruin my life. Instinctively I have laterly been drawn to meditation, Chapra, and solitude. Thank you for re-affirming that these types of centering devices can literally help me re-claim myself. It’s about time.

By: Monica Ricci

Monica Ricci — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 15:34:02 +0000

What a great article. I am very balanced left-to-right brain with a highly developed logical side (I’m an organizing expert for Pete’s sake!) and I’ve never been a person who thrives on “drama” as we say these days. YET, my eyes well up at the smallest things that make no sense. Also, when someone else cries near me, they fill up and I feel embarrassed by it because I have no control of it. It is so frustrating to me!

However, even before I found this article, I recently had a client cry in the midst of a work session (which is not unusual) and for the FIRST TIME ever, I was able to control my eyes from tearing up and be supportive without appearing to cry myself. I’m not sure how I did it exactly but reading this article I believe I used step three to get outside of MY head and focus on saying something that would aid my client. The whole “being a separate person” thing, I guess. Anyway thank you so much for a great insightful piece!

By: Minha

Minha — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 01:28:25 +0000

This article really helped me understand, thank you Anna.

By: Kelvin

Kelvin — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 11:24:46 +0000

Thank you, I can relate to almost everything you have said. I have always had the ability to empathise but as I develop it is becoming an issue.

I have worked through Initiation Into Hermetics and I am now developing my psychic side further and my biggest problem is ‘taking on other peoples woes and tribulations’ especially when I connect with them. I try not to but I am finding it almost impossible, I am even taking on some of their links (not the good ones). Ok I am able to eventually release them but it is usually unpleasant until I do.

I have fully removed all the links that I do not want and have put blocks in place so I only link at my convenience but! this is restrictive because I am loosing some social interaction below pleasantries. How have you got around this?

By: Terri

Terri — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 22:09:20 +0000

Thank You Anne! It’s amazing how Blind we can be to our own selves and how willing we are to be fully open to others!
I am 49 and have spent much of my life in states of absolute pain in My emotional life for just the reasons you’ve shared here. Recognizing too that when Happiness has come into my life, it stays for such short periods. It appears that in my ignorance I have unwittingly sabotaged Boundary/Balance ratio and fallen into the Others ways, means and needs, leaving my own starved and forgotten.
All of this due to what I’ve know to be my Empathic nature, but unchecked it’s caused me distress and pain.
Your statement above is me to a ‘T’ : ( copied below )
““As a healer/ friend/ girlfriend/ daughter/ sister (or whichever role I thought my empathy was helping me in) overactive empathy enables me to serve everyone better. It allows me to anticipate and fulfill the needs of others. It motivates me to help others. In fact, it would be downright selfish to turn it off!””

I also carry the clairvoyant and sentient senses.
These have taken Back-Burner so to speak, it appears, due to the overwhelming emotional flood of empathy.

Thank You, I now have greater understanding in how balancing can serve others better when all three ( and whatever more there may be) live in a more harmonious way, in me.

Deepest Gratitude!
Lovingly
Terri

By: Anu

Anu — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 16:52:34 +0000

Hi Anna

Thanks for the wonderful articles!!

I am an empath who doesn’t know to turn this gift on or off at will.

I have been initiated to meditation and have been trying something similar to your centering technique (which I learnt from my guru)to ground my energy whenever there is a need.

I was finding it difficult to meditate and concentrate and be in the present moment as I keep shouldering others emotions and pain all the time and I try to heal them.

I am trying to stop identifying with others emotions and pain as mine. Only recently am I suceeding a little in separating myself from others emotions and negative endergy.

Will try your technique also as I feel your articles will help me understand how to handle myself better.

Thank you so much Anna!! All the very best to you and your good work which helps others so much!!

Anu

By: FrontalFul2000

FrontalFul2000 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 01:55:58 +0000

So this is what people meant when they say I need to learn to stop taking other people so seriously.

I definitely had overactive empathy, now I’m going to enjoy having it firmly switched into the “off” position for a change, I’ll start opening it back up selectively and consciously when I know I’m ready to.

Now that I am split off from people’s emotions I can observe their words, their expressions, their conversations.

All my life people said I need to “open up more” I took that advice too literally(opening up my energy systems) and made my hyperempathy problem worse.

By: Anna Leigh

Anna Leigh — Mon, 17 Oct 2011 18:46:39 +0000

Thank you for this series. I’ve known I was an Empath for about a year or two now. I never really felt the need to learn to control it.. But now there’s a sudden urgency to learn how. I was in a local cemetary with some friends the other night. It’s notoriously haunted in our town. You may want to google it: Ansonia pine grove haunted. Anyways it was about 10 pm and we were sitting by a statue in the cemetery which is rumored to move. Which is true because i saw him moving with my own eyes. But i started picking up on the emotions of a man who i believe is named Jacob. Well this man had really didn’t like one of my friends in particular. I had the incredible urge to strangle him and i almost acted on it. Of course my friends don’t know about my ability so they think i was possessed….

By: Tanya

Tanya — Sun, 16 Oct 2011 04:01:27 +0000

OH My GOD…..THank you for writing and letting me read those articles……how i need it…i need to work on my overactive empathy…i feel like this is going to take some time….because its somthing that just always has been…….a big sigh of releif to know i am not alone….thank you a thousand times…xox

By: nim

nim — Sun, 02 Oct 2011 19:14:02 +0000

I didn’t know about clairsentinence or empathy before. I browsed it up today because I wanted to find what was odd inside me….why I feel so negative without any reasons…why I feel weird…or like chills, tickling and shocks in the body for no reasons…I have been trying to know about it. I was even thinking to go to psychiatrist…All of sudden I get upset, sometimes crazy….sometimes,,,afraid for no reasons…afraid for like something going to happen..and they happens. I dreams whenever something bad or horrible was going to happen in my life. I dreamt abt my grandma death…on 9th august 5:4 am…When I woke up, I just knew tat someone is going to die…Later, around 8 am, we got the news of her death.

Sometime, I get thisfeeling tat…its nt right or…just speak widout thinkng and they just happens.

I said to my uncle…few months ago tat…he sud change the car coz it wud lead to more accidents…and since I said…I dint knw wy i said…i jst got the feeling and I blurted out instantly…widout any control…and it turned true and he had to buy a new car…

I had so many experiences tat its hard to explain here…I cud tell who is bad and gud…and I cn tell just by seeing pic if its going to b fine…I cn tell about marriages…and etc etc…

But i was really bothered by my negativity…tats what my close ones call it…feeling like…idk…wid out any reasons….all of suddens…sometime, just after talking to a someone who is feeling sad…or

its ruining my life…I mean i have no reason to feel extreme pessimist…bt i cnt stop it…I dont even knw the reasons…and I get this dark feelings…just feelings…no thoughts…I wont thnk bad…just feelings in the body…